Miscommunication.

I wish I were a tree, I wish I was a tree. Whatever the grammar is, what I really mean is I don’t want to hear anything. I just want to be still, no feelings. But I can’t. It is just not me. I sometimes wonder, am I a good friend, am I a good listener, did I or have I made my friend happy, am I an ignorant person? Coz my mind is too messed up with this conflict now. Way too messed up. And I wish I were a tree. For a moment.

I don’t know how to mend this heart. I feel depressed. This whole week is a test for me. I hate myself for being like this. How many people have I ignored, how many people that I have made to tears? Sometimes, I just don’t know how to handle it. Only tears. Tears are like my best friend now. Sometimes it doesn’t want to flow out as usual, coz my heart feels hurt.

I am just being myself. But now, it is almost like everyone misunderstands me. Or am I thinking too much? Sigh. Pitiful. Silence is golden, my best friend said. Ya, Maybe I should be. It’s better than talking and misunderstood by anyone. Coz it’s hurtful.

Silent is the way. Probably.